Split Personality

Sometimes a person can perhaps have a split personality. A person can have an appearance which reflects piety but inside his heart, he may be as rotten as a banana. On the other hand, a person may appear to be very sinful but perhaps he keeps within his heart certain principles that render him to be pious. The examples on this particular matter are vast. The underlying theme is that we know what our minds conjure behind words of piety and we most assuredly know what our limbs commit behind closed doors. A person has two personalities; a pious one and a sinful one.

It is for this reason that Allah Ta’ala mentions in Surah Baqarah, “Did I not tell you, verily I know what is hidden between the Heavens and the Earth. And I know what you make apparent and what you may conceal.” Allah Ta’ala has mentioned the two sides of a person. A person’s internal appearance and his external appearance. The aim for a Muslim is to make both of these sides submit to Allah Ta’ala. It is almost as if we have two lives and the objective of both is to please Allah rabbul ’izzah. Only once both the external and internal sides conform to Allah’s Ta’ala rulings and commands, we attain this submission and balance.

In order to attain this spiritual excellence, a person must always be aware of his deeds. Thus the split personality of a person can be seen in different ways :

1. Some people are such that in their regular day to day business they live with a split personality. A classic example would be of that person who sees a beautiful, young lady crossing the road. In his appearance he is lowering his gaze which suggests that he is pious but in his mind he is conjuring immoral thoughts. Similar is the case of a sister who may appear to be God-fearing by her firm words and persona but in her heart she may be conceal intense love for a boy whom it is not permissible for her to love. Thus there is a double life being led simultaneously.

2. The second example is of that person who splits when the opportunity presents itself and discards his pious side and turns to his sinful nature. An example of this person may perhaps be of that person who is a pious and maintains great righteousness; however, if he goes to a person’s house where music is being played and movies are being watched, his demeanour will change rapidly and he will joyfully partake in such actions. Similarly, a sister may be pious but if she is sitting with a group of girls who are gossiping and backbiting; she too will ‘split’ as the opportunity presents itself and begin backbiting and gossiping. It is seen in these examples that a person becomes taken over by this sinful personality inside, once the sin he has partaken in is over, he returns to his normal state.

3. The third type of person is that Muslim who momentarily looses control of himself and shows his sinful nature. This is typically seen in all Muslims in the state of anger when it is unnecessary. For example, a person is of a pious nature and very rarely gets angry. However, one day he comes home one day after a long days work and he is hoping for a nice, hot, dish of daal, chawal and subzi. However, when he gets home, he finds his wife has been sitting on the phone all day long and as a result, he implodes and lets out ‘maa ben’ swearwords. However, after a few minutes he calms down and realises he is wrong and goes back to his own self. Similarly, there is a sister who may have a sibling who happens to be a bit mischievous. One day the sibling may perhaps take the GHD hair straightener and as a result, the elder sister becomes extremely angry. Once again, after a few seconds, she realises that such argument is petty and best avoided; thus she returns to her usual self.

4. The final example is of that person who remains at a pious level all the time and when the thought of rebelling comes into his mind, he suppresses himself or he teaches himself not to be agitated by trivial things. For example, a brother is a really pious sufi saab. He does not get into sins and is constantly in the remembrance of Allah Ta’ala internally and externally. However, one day he is extremely tired and he sees that prayer time is departing without him having prayed. He struggles internally because his nafs does not want to pray and he struggles externally because he is tired. He has pressure from both sides.The thought passes his mind to read Qaza later on however, his constant level of piety prevails and his regular practices come to his aid. Thus he is easily able to ignore the wrong and continue to live righteously.

How does a person get to this stage? The answer is in the Jibril Hadith, “Worship Allah as if you can see him and if you cannot, then truly He sees you.” A person has to continually work his mind to a state where he knows that Allah Ta’ala is watching him and that he must refrain from wrong. It is like the situation of a parent and a child. A child will be instructed from a tender age not to use swear words otherwise he will get beaten with a cricket bat. Then, due to this firm warning, he will not swear due to remembering the words of his parents subconsciously. As a result, even when a person grows into a man, he will never swear in front of his parents. In the same way, we must grow a consciousness over the commands of Allah Ta’ala. If we continually keep them in our mind, we will be able to suppress our other side. To do this, we must sit and analyse our sins and recognise where we lapse the most. Then, we must continually drill it into ourselves that it is wrong. At first we may continue to sin, however gradually we will recognise the wrong we are doing and be able to diverge from it. A person should never feel down, things like this do not happen over night (sometimes they do but this is Allah's fazl, He gives it to whom He wants). We must remember that Rome was not built over night. Or in Islamic terms, the extension of Masjidul Haram in Makkah wasn't built over night!

May Allah Ta’ala give us the ability to rectify ourselves in order to conform with His commands. Ameen ya Rabbal aalameen.