I am sure at some point in your life, you have met a person who you felt was a well wisher; only to have your trust in them obliterated. Perhaps you have been ‘that person’ in the past who betrayed the trusts of people who trusted you most. Maybe you still are that person, from whose tongue every person is wary.
Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam said in one hadith related in Al Adabul Mufrad, "The worst person is someone who is two-faced. He is the person who comes to one group of people with one face and another group of people with another face."
This hadith highlights the situation of a person who transforms and changes his colours like a chameleon. An example of this could be of a person whom you consider to be your friend; he constantly says well to you and does good to you and as soon as he has left your company, he tells other people things which you would not like them to hear whether it be abuse, secrets, lies etc.
Such people are transformers! There is more to them than meets the eye. A person should remain vigilant as to who these people are in his life. And as soon as he finds out who they are, he should keep his distance from them. This is not to say that he totally breaks off connection from him but rather that he remains prudent in relation to himself i.e. he does not go and tell that ‘transformer’ all of his secrets and have a deep, heart warming conversations with him.
Every person knows the state of their own Iman. A person may appear pious or sinful in front of the people but only Allah Ta’ala and that individual knows the state of his belief. We may be able to deceive the people and at times we may even be able to deceive ourselves in relation to piety but we can never deceive Allah Ta’ala.
It is thus important to peer into one’s own life and try finding instances where he has ‘transformed’ into a two faced person and has spread lies to cause hurt and disunity. Malik Ibn Dinar rahimahullah would say, “When you see that your heart has become hard, your body has become weak and that your sustenance has become Haram; know that you have spoken in regards to those matters which did not concern you!”
Likewise, Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam has mentioned a great caution for that person who likes to push his foul speech around like an Asda trolley! Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam has mentioned, "The person who has two faces in this world will have two tongues of the Fire on the Day of Rising.”
Thus there are many things we can do to save ourselves from falling into this category:
1. Stop betraying trusts
2. Stop spreading rumours
3. Stop spreading lies
4. Stop causing disunity/fights between two people
5. Staying away from such situations
6. Ponder over our speech
7. Apologise to those people whom we have hurt
8. Try to fix relations we have broken
9. Fix a penalty of some sadaqah every time we happen to slip up
10. Seek forgiveness from Allah Ta’ala.
Just don’t be that person who causes hurt wherever he goes; who disunites people by the weight of his tongue; who lies to satisfy his itching and devours the respect of people in the manner a serpent savages its prey. You are not that person; so don’t be. Be free from hate and cooled by patience, calm in disposition and aware of speech; be forgiving and shine with humility. All you need to do is put a full stop on your last evil speech and place a line under it. Now begin a new chapter and fill it with goodness.
May Allah Ta’ala protect us and give us the ability to use our tongues correctly. Ameen.